Review of the Redeye

I was asked via shoutbox on Blog Catalog by good friend and fellow blogger Juliana Matthews aka Ladygoodwood to review two films she had just seen on a flight as she thought I'd do a good review of them, well ego boosted I set out on my mission to complete this task. Funnily enough I actually believed I owned the first film Invictus on DVD but realised I had just picked it up in a store before but didn't buy it so I took a trip to an online DVD store and then two days later it arrived in the post and eagerly I set about watching the film and I was not disappointed.

INVICTUS

The film tells the inspirational true life story of how Nelson Mandela joined forces with the captain of South Africa's national rugby team Francois Pienaar to help unite their Native Country. Newly elected President Mandela knows all to well his Nation remains racially and economically divided in the wake of apartheid. Believing there to be only one way to unite the people of his Country through the universal language of sport, Mandela rallies South Africa's rugby team as they make their historic run to the Rugby World Cup final against the most dominating force in International rugby of that time the mighty All Blacks, New Zealand.

This is a wondrously well crafted film based on the novel "Playing the Enemy: Nelson Mandela and the Game That Made a Nation" by John Carlin and expertly reworked for the screen by screenwriter Anthony Peckham whose other screenwriting credits include "Sherlock Holmes" and "Don't say a Word" but it's in the direction of Clint Eastwood that brings this film to forefront of great films of this decade, once again Eastwood has chosen a subject matter that as an actor he wouldn't have been given the opportunity to work with and created one of his best films of his career. His career as a director is vast approaching eclipsing his historic career as an actor with this his 31st film as director and with Hoover and Hereafter which will reunite him with Matt Damon on the horizon there is another Oscar nomination or win in his not to distant future.

The central performance by Morgan Freeman is as great as you would imagine being that he was born to play this role and play the role he does. He portrays Mandela the man not Mandela the myth which is something I think most actors would fail to accomplish. His performance is filled with grace and gravitas befitting the great man he is portraying my only question is where does Mr. Freeman go from here? He's portrayed God, the President of the United States and now President Mandela what iconic figures are left for an actor of this stature to portray? I had heard of a rumoured Clint Eastwood pet project about the life of the Blues great BB King maybe this would be a great role for Freeman if he is willing to bulk up.

I was skeptical when I heard that Matt Damon had been cast as Francois Pienaar as I could barely remember him as a player and didn't really see a strong resemblance between them or think a non South African should play the role but humble pie I must eat as Damon owns the role completely. As an actor I actually do like Damon's work, The Bourne movies, Dogma, Good Will Hunting, Saving Private Ryan and in the Departed he puts in stellar performances I guess it's the whole Team America thing every time I hear his name I remember the way that puppet said it 'Mattt Daaamooon', and it makes me laugh, childish I know but it was really funny the first time I saw that movie.

I think special praise should go out to another actor who has been criminally overlooked by most reviewers of this film and that would be Tony Kgoroge who portrays Mandela's head of security Jason Tshabalala in the film. With very little dialogue for the length of screen time he has he created an incredibly well rounded character that really sticks in your mind. He also manages to do this while sharing the screen with Morgan Freeman who is putting in a career best performance which makes it all the more impressive.

Invictus was budgeted at $60,000,000 and grossed $124,479,778 worldwide and earned two Oscar nominations and is a great film even if you don't understand the rules of rugby or aren't a sports film fan in general there is so much depth to the film that there is something for everyone.

THE BOAT THAT ROCKED

The Boat That Rocked or Pirate Radio as it was distributed as by US distributor Universal is an ensemble British romantic comedy with a twist as the romance in the film is between the young British people of the 1960's and pop music. The film is very loosely based on Radio Caroline, a popular pirate radio ship with a similar history and style. Directed by Richard Curtis (Love Actually) and starring an amazing cast including Philip Seymour Hoffman, Bill Nighy, Kenneth Branagh, Nick Frost, Gemma Arterton and a surprisingly short appearance by Emma Thompson the film is about a group of rogue DJ's that captivated Britain, playing the music that defined that era and standing up to a government that believed such music was almost pornographic.

With a script written by Richard Curtis who wrote Four Weddings and a Funeral, Notting Hill, the Bridget Jones movies and Love Actually I was slightly hesitant of this film at first. I'm not a big Rom-Com fan and found the movies mentioned above to be to sappy even for my taste but as he also wrote such classic British works as Blackadder, Not the Nine O'clock News and French and Saunders I was willing to give it a go.

The film has it's moments Hoffman, Frost and Nighy are on top form as always and the rest of the cast do their best with what they are given but I felt some of the other characters where underwritten and the plot dragged a little in the middle, the 2 hour running time could and probably should have been cut to closer to 90 minutes but on a whole I found it to be very charming in a very British way. It's a 6/10 kind of film for me, I like it, just not loving it but I will watch anything with Bill Nighy in it the man is a genius.

The Boat That Rocked made $29,800,000 worldwide which is very healthy for a British comedy as British humour often doesn't translate well into other languages or other regions. If your looking for a no brainer with a couple of good laughs check it out if you're looking for something with a bit more meat on it's bones I'd go with Invictus.

Anyhoo

Thanking You

The Housebound Writer

Mixed Bag

Today's blog post is a bit of a mixed bag and contains movie news I meant to post last night so it's no longer new news so to speak. The reason for the lateness of my blog entry is actually a good one I was busy writing a guest post on a friend's blog and I'd like to take this opportunity to thank her for allowing little auld me to have that honor, so thank you Jazz.


Movie Not So New News


Ed Norton will not be appearing in The Avengers movie after Marvel revealed they plan on recasting the Bruce Banner role with an unknown actor. This has caused a very split response amongst fans of these kind of movies online on the message boards. People either don't Care as they didn't like his performance in The Incredible Hulk or they are mad at Marvels' cost cutting on their dream movie.



My take on it is there is only three reason for casting a different actor:
1. Financial
His character doesn't appear on screen enough to warrant Norton's pay check and with Samuel L. Jackson, Robert Downey Jr., Chris Evans, Chris Hemsworth (next big thing), Scarlett Johansson, Don Cheadle, Jeremy Renner and Tom Hiddleston already in the impressive cast you can see why cutting costs is on the Studio's mind.

2. New Direction
Marvel want to take the character in a different direction or concentrate more on The Hulk than on Banner.

3. Difficult Actor

It's well documented that Ed Norton can be a difficult actor to work with unless you like your actors to confront you when you have a different take on a scene than they do, frankly I wouldn't see this as a problem myself a confrontational actor is a passionate actor and worst case scenario I would just lamp him one.

The Plot

The plot is a closely kept open secret as Marvel will neither confirm or deny Internet rumours. I see the recasting as a clear signal that the plot will centre around The Hulk as the villain controlled by Loki, a plot device that Ed Norton has been vocally against for some time but Marvel see big bucks in an on screen confrontation between Thor and The Hulk. The only problem is with casting a new actor it will be the third actor in as many movies to play the role and isn't continuity something Marvel preached about when setting up this franchise gatherer?



Me time


Today was my weekly visit to the psychologist and for the second week in a row I have come away with homework, I didn't get this much homework in High School but every little piece of the puzzle we can find can help determine a way to improve my stress and depression problems. I still find it kind of funny that a person who sits at home all day doing SFA can have stress problems but I'm told it's all part of a vicious circle of get depressed which stresses me out which makes me more depressed yadda yadda yadda anyway I got this timetable thing to fill in with every hour of the day on it. I fill in the blank spaces with what I was doing and how stressed out of 100 I was doing it. It humorously starts at 7am in the morning which is funny to me as I tend not to get up till 11am. How many of these boxes are going to be filled with "was online" or "was watching TV" do we think poeple, 1/3 or most, lol.


I went for a family excursion to a shopping mall today after dinner, parents were buying a silver wedding gift, my Brother was going to look at the magazines and X Box 360 games so I thought as my back has been calm today I would tag along. We separated into two groups upon arriving, parents went one way us kids (me 28 him 33) went another. We went to WH Smiths which I don't think will be a name my overseas readers will know, let's think how to describe it? Eh, a hell here's the link they sell this stuff:


http://www.whsmiths.co.uk/


I think that will work anyway back to the story. We were looking at the magazines my brother the video game magazines me the blues music and film magazines and when we had found some that looked interesting enough to buy, which is harder than it sounds I find, I went up to the checkout to pay. The cashier was staring at me constantly while the line was decreasing in front of me and kind of freaking me out, I was thinking have I got something on my face? Have I knocked something over? As I approached the checkout I handed my soon to be purchases over to the short smiley girl behind the counter and fished nervously into my pocket for my bank card, damn magazine prices have gone up, lol. This was our brief conversation.


Smiley Girl: Your that guy right?
Me: Whit? (I'm always so polite, lol)
Smiley Girl: Yeah yeah your that guy, right?
Me: I'm a guy yes, how much for these?
She scans the magazines and then picks up a bag.
Smiley Girl: £13.32
I place my card in the chip and pin and nervously await my pin request.
Smiley Girl: I know you.
Me: Do you? That's cool.
Enter pin, get card back.
Smiley Girl: You got a blog don't cha?
Me: Yeah that's right.
Clapping her hands.
Smiley Girl: I read your blog, I read your blog.
Me: Cool thank you.
I reach out my hand to receive the magazines.
Smiley Girl: Say it.
Me: Sayyyy What?
Smiley Girl: Your catchphrase.
Me: I have a catchphrase?
Smiley Girl: Yeah you do, at the end of every new one you write it.
Me: What thanking you?
Smiley Girl: That's it, that's my favourite catchphrase I use it all the time.
Me: Oh OK.
She nods towards me.
Me: Thanking you!
She giggles.
Smiley Girl: Haha that's manic, love it.
Me: OK bye.
Smiley Girl: Thanking you!
I smile then leave quickly, my brother finds this very funny.

As the weather has turned from sun splitting the trees to the trees getting washed away down the street in Scotland I thought I'd finish with a picture of Oscar to cheer myself up, here's one with him wearing his favourite hat.

Anyhoo here's a special one for Smiley Girl

Thanking You
The Housebound Writer

Short Fiction 2

As I've not posted one of my short stories for awhile I thought I would put that right, this one like my blog post back on May 15Th I have a title and a character name but the rest I will just see what comes as I'm writing, writing blind here people which should be fun.

Insomniac Dreams

By Andrew G. Carson

For the love of the chased requiem had engulfed her and her faith in this love was unequalled and not without reason for slumber had been a best friend and lover for Nora's entire twenty one years on this traveling fireball we call home. Slumber had been the only constant in her ever changing life but tonight he was lost to her and she could feel the bitterness of realisation that her lover may be spending the night in another's arms. Insomnia affects all of us differently some use it to release their inner creative force others feel like every bone in their body is on fire and the reaper is at the door but for Nora it was neither of these just the feeling of betrayal from her most trusted friend.

She lay on her bed staring up at the off white coloured ceiling of her sparse apartment bedroom, her eyes already accustomed to the darkness engulfing her boudoir like a late night prowler. How had she arrived at such a lonesome point in her life with no friends only coworkers, no boyfriend only memories of past sorrow and no family on speed dial only Chinese take away restaurants. She hadn't always been this way she was once the life and soul of every party she attended, rooms lit up with her mere presence but now the closest thing to a social gathering for her was when her neighbour's cat would pay her a visit.

It was 03:21am and the noise of birdsong from beyond the ever lighter shade of dark coloured bedroom windows was driving her mad, what have they got to be so damn chirpy about? Thought Nora as she impaled the back of her head into her pillow hard while pulling the sides up over her ears. How can this side of the World sleep with this incessant racket drowning out the peace of silence? She questioned her inner self as the thought of choking that bird to silent death sprang into her head raising the sides of her mouth to a smile. She rose from bed and awkwardly stumbled to the window to gaze out upon her tormentor but alas she could not see him for the hundred year old oak behind her sandstone apartment building shaking it's leaves and branches at her menacingly in the early morning breeze.

She shrugged and staggered sleepily towards the kitchen through the conjoining living room turning the living room light switch on and off as she passes it as she does so her elbow knocks her receptionist of the year award off it's shelf, a plaque which she was only given to her as a peace offering after she was overlooked for a promotion. She entered the kitchen and opened the fridge unleashing a light that could lead the dead to heaven. Why has sleep betrayed her tonight of all nights? She paused to consider, did he not know of her important appointment in the morning, had he not listened to her thoughts of worry? What if she turns up looking like she has been out all night drinking? She would definitely not gain favour with the team over at Gilbert & Hall and she desperately ached to do so for this would free her from her shackles at Muir and Hollis where she has been overlooked time after time for they only give promotions to members of the boys club and she had the wrong kind of plumbing to join their club.

She stood back and brought the bottle of water in her hand up to her waiting parched lips she felt a slight buzz from the cold liquid as it slid down the back of her throat en route to her stomach, ahhh she said quietly to herself as she gathered the much needed energy to return to her chamber of sorrow. She placed the now half empty bottle of water back into the fridge and closed the door on the teasing light, with a deep sigh she walked back into the living room and picked up her least wanted award and placed it back upon it's dust covered shelf next to the photograph of her parents she paused briefly to look at the photo before turning the light switch on and off like before, a creature of habit Nora definitely was but this time as the light retreated out of the corner of her eye she spotted something...

It couldn't be her mind must be playing tricks on her she thought but when she tried to continue on her journey she found her feet not moving. "I know you saw me." a voice from behind her said quietly. Her body stiffened and she could feel a cold sweat on the back of her knees, Nora closed her eyes briefly before turning round. "Who's there, who are you?" she said with a notable wobble in her voice. "The man that's going to kill you if you don't do what I say." The reply came without a hint of emotion to the voice. "take anything but just don't touch me." Nora called out still to afraid to turn on the light switch. "Oh I'm going to take what I want you stupid C***, I don't need your permission." he replied. That word, the "C" word was one she hated and she wasn't going to let this bastard get away with calling her by it.

Nora reached around and flicked the switch to illuminate her would be attacker, he was average height and of stocky build and he had a pair of stockings over his head like the old bank robbers used to wear squishing his face out of shape to hide his identity. "F*** you!" Nora found herself saying with an anger in her voice that she had never heard before. "What did you say b****?" He replied shocked by her new found strength. "You heard me, get out of my house or so help m.." he cut of her line of thought as well as her speech as he lunged for her, his hands encased her neck, squeeze, squeeze her windpipe would surely crush under the pressure. Squeeze, squeeze he seemed impervious to the punches and slaps thrown by Nora for he outweighed her by sixty to seventy pounds and he was a good five inches taller than she was.

Squeeze, squeeze Nora's eyes bloodshot and on the verge of bursting with the pressure. "you stupid little c***, I'll kill you." His words echoed in her ears, that word again that "C" word Nora reached around to find something anything to save her life. Her fingers stretching up behind her back as her attacker continued to choke her the way she had thought about choking the singing bird. Nora's arms ached due to the contortion they were enduring to find a saviour, squeeze, squeeze his eyes glistened with glee through his stocking mask. Nora was close to the end when her hand finally reached something with every ounce of strength she outstretched her arm and swung her new found weapon colliding it with the back of her attacker's skull.

Slowly he dropped to his knees with a shocked expression upon his face the thought that a woman had ended his existence was something he could not believe. Nora dropping her weapon stumbles over to the kitchen door and reaches into the fridge and to grab her water bottle and slowly, slowly she raises it up against her bright red savaged neck. After a moment she looks over at the motionless body on her living room floor and her blood stained plaque. "Who's the c*** now? " she barks at her attacker before collapsing onto the floor, " Who's the C*** now?"

After hours of police questions Nora still shaken and traumatised by her ordeal finds herself lying in a hospital bed alone with her thoughts once more only a vase of cheap flowers sits beside her bed with a card attached from 'the office of Muir & Hollis', she looks over at the window and watches the rain collide with the glass, slowly, slowly she finds her eyes begin to close and before long her lover has returned to her as she drifts off to slumber.

And a Little Mo'

Today has been a great day so far my back so far has been downgraded from severe to bearable on the pain scale and I have just downloaded the new Keb' Mo' album Live and Mo' from ITunes and am quietly chilling out listening to his crossover easy listening Blues sound. If you're not familiar with Mr. Keb' Mo' here's a brief Little history of this great artist:

Keb' Mo' born Kevin Moore on October 3rd 1951 in South Central Los Angeles, he is an American Blues singer, guitarist and songwriter who currently resides in Nashville, Tennessee. From a very early age Keb' had an appreciation for the blues and gospel music and by early adolescence he was already an accomplished guitarist.

His career started with him playing the steel drums and upright bass in a calypso band. He moved on to play in a bunch of blues bands and backing bands throughout the 70s and 80s. His recording career started in the 70s with Jefferson Airplane violinist Papa John Creach through an R&B group. Creach hired him when Keb' was only 21 years old and Keb' appeared on four of Creach's albums, Filthy!, the hilariously entitled Playing my fiddle for you, I'm the fiddle man and Rock Father.

In 1994 Keb' released his self titled debut album, Keb' Mo', which featured two Robert Johnson covers "come on in my kitchen" and "kind hearted woman blues", in the Martin Scorsese miniseries The Blues, Keb' states that he was greatly influenced by Johnson. Which is why in 1998 he went on to portray Robert Johnson in the documentary film Can't you hear the wind howl?

Keb' is also a political activist and in 2004 participated in the politically motivated Vote For Change tour alongside his long time friends and frequent collaborators Bonnie Raitt and Jackson Browne. Keb' Mo' is also part of the No Nukes group which was against the expansion of Nuclear power. In 2007 the group recorded a music video for a new version of the Buffalo Springfield song "For What It's Worth". Keb' Mo' has also won 3 Grammy Awards over the years for his albums Just Like You, Slow Down and Keep It Simple. Since his debut album Keb' Mo' has released 10 others including his most recent which I'm currently listening to which is a mix of previously released tracks, live recordings and four new songs and would really make a good introduction to his music for anyone who is unfamiliar with him.

The only blip so far today was when I entered the kitchen and didn't realise the floor just next to the fridge was wet and as you've probably guessed the klutz that I am slid on it and went down like a ton of bricks on top of my ankle. The reason for the wet floor was simple my little sidekick Oscar had just been having a drink and drooled it all over the place, now I know that he didn't do this on purpose he's just a messy drinker but when he comes over to you when you've just fell on your butt and he has a big daft grin on his face and those mischievous eyes it's hard not to think he knew what he was doing.

Anyhoo

Thanking You

The Housebound Writer

Kill Me Now!

That old terrible thing started on Thursday around midday again, no it's not Keanu Reeves latest attempt at acting I'm talking about but instead it is something less wooden than that. What I'm referring to is my back or as I should say my back pain. On a scale of 1-10 with 1 being a boo boo and 10 being oh my Christ kill me now! It's at about an 8 and working it's way up to a 9. Every nerve ending in my body feels like they are on fire and I can't for the life of me get comfortable be it lying down or standing up resulting in me only having about three hours sleep in the last four days but it could be worse I guess.

So far so not good it's taken me two and a half hours to write the first paragraph as I've had to get up walk about, crash on my bed and try not to swear to loudly as I curse my back using every four letter word I know and I know a lot of them trust me. If a passer by heard me they would think I was killing someone in here. Let's try and take a deep breath and try to turn this into a more productive blog entry, OK here we go, on the message boards I seem to have been given a new nickname my second so far the first was Non after the Jack O'Halloran role in Superman 2 as I am supposed to look like the guy I'll let you decide on that one.

My new nickname appears to be chewie after the wookie in Star Wars after a brief message board conversation on a film site where I had declared that I hadn't liked the newest three Star Wars films as much as the originals but this was probably due to the fact that I saw the originals as a wee kid and thought characters like chewie and C3P0 were real and without child's eyes anymore the magic had gone for me. I also said that I though Hayden Christensen was to short to play the young Darth Vader because David Prowse was like 7 foot tall. I like to put these kind of comments on this particular site when I'm depressed as it cheers me up to see the Star Wars fanatics jump all over them to defend all George Lucas' decisions because in their eyes he is a God, I know I'm pretty childish doing this but it gives me something to do with my time and it is very, very funny I recommend any depressed person out there to try it just ignore the impending death threats you will receive on the site cause mostly they tell you they are going to strike you down with their light sabre or some crap like that.

The only problem is I've realised a lot of the same people visit all the other movie sites that I do and the nickname has followed me, they tell me I'm called chewie because I said on a message board that when I get my height measured by the doctors I'm six foot seven standing up but six foot nine lying down, it's to do with the fact my back problems stops me from standing up straight as it's to painful to do so. So now I've been brandished with the nickname chewie as I'm tall and have a hairy face I guess the nickname could be worse and at least it's not offensive or to offensive.

Well my back just went up to a 9 so this will have to get wrapped up soon, it's taken over three hours to type so far and I can't actually remember what I originally was going to post about but hey it has past some time, some painful time but some time none the less, anyhoo.

Thanking You

The Housebound Writer

SpiderMan Revealed

-SpiderMan Reboot News-

The Marc Webb helmed do-over of the SpiderMan franchise now has it's star and he is Andrew Garfield. Garfield who has appeared in such films as the Red Riding trilogy, The Other Boleyn Girl, Lions For Lambs and The Imaginarium Of Doctor Parnassus beat out competition from the likes of Logan Lerman, Jamie bell, Aaron Johnson and Anton Yelchin. The firm favourite for the role up until very recently was 17 year old Josh Hutchenson the star of the upcoming Red Dawn remake and Cirque Du Freak: The Vampire's Assistant seemed to be on track to take the lead and it is seen as somewhat of a shock by most for Andrew Garfield to be cast not just because of his status in Hollywood but also his age 26, as the new SpiderMan film takes place during the lead character's school days.

-In Production-

Gotham Group and LionsGate are said to be extremely happy with the Pre Production of their latest movie Abduction, the film being Directed by John Singleton centres around a young man who sets out to uncover the truth about his life after he discovers his baby photo on a missing persons website. The film stars Taylor Lautner and has a very impressive supporting cast including Maria Bello, Alfred Molina, Sigourney Weaver, Jason Isaacs and Lily Collins. Production starts on the 12Th of July and is scheduled to run till 22ND of September and is expected to be released just prior to the big summer blockbusters next year in late March early April.

LOL-Laughing Out Loud is another LionsGate production currently in Pre Production and here is the plot: In a World connected by Youtube, ITunes and Facebook Lola and her friends navigate the peer pressures of high school romance and friendship while dodging their sometimes overbearing and confused parents. When Lola's mother Anne, "accidentally" reads her teenage Daughter's racy journal, she realises just how wide their communication gap has grown. Through Hilarious and heartfelt moments between Mother and Daughter, LOL is a fresh coming of age story for modern times. These were not my words but the words of the Studio releasing this film as you could probably tell. This film stars Miley Cyrus as Lola and Demi Moore as her Mother Anne with a supporting cast including Ashley Greene and Douglas Booth and sounds like the kind of film I will give a wide berth, not my cup of tea at all but I think it will probably have a healthy take at the box office thanks in part to Ms Cyrus' tween fans.

-Casting News-

And for any of you actors/actresses out there here is a heads up on the latest 20th Century Fox and Oscar winning Director Cameron Crowe's latest film (based on a true story) We Bought A Zoo. The film is currently in Pre Production and Casting Director Gail Leven is conducting a national talent search and online open casting call for three lead roles for two teens and a child, here's a link for details:

http://www.examiner.com/examiner/x-42949-LA-Acting-Auditions-Examiner~y2010m6d16-20th-Century-Fox-national-talent-search-for-Cameron-Crowe-feature-film-We-Bought-A-Zoo

Anyhoo

Thanking You

The Housebound Writer

Killer Penguins 3D

Great quotes generally come from great people be it:

(Hope these are right they are from memory)

"For to win one hundred victories in one hundred battles is not the acme of skill. To subdue the enemy without fighting is the acme of skill." by Sun Tzu

"A cynic is a man who knows the price of everything but the value of nothing." By Oscar Wilde

"A genuine leader is not a searcher for consensus but a molder of consensus." By Martin Luther King Jr.

"A hero is born among a hundred, a wise man is found among a thousand, but an accomplished one might not be found even among a hundred thousand" By Plato

"All that we see or seem is but a dream within a dream." Edgar Allan Poe

" What the F***, killer Penguins?" may not fit into this fine list of great quotes but it did make me laugh out loud when I read it in a screenplay I received via E-Mail from a friend of mine, maybe friend is to strong a word, acquaintance? Maybe... Nah only kidding there B. A. B. Now If you ever get the chance to check out one of his scripts I implore you to do so as they are hilarious and thankfully that is on purpose. I won't put his link up here as it will really annoy him as he hates for people to help him in his search for traffic to his blog but trust me it is themed in name and if you can find it, maybe you can read the daft words of B. A Binoculars himself AKA the Cinema Voyeur.

B.A's blog posts are about his experiences getting into Movie Premieres and test screenings and often kicked out and what he thought of the films. He butchers a lot of films in a very humorous way and at times he goes over the top but it's out of love for movies he says. I've recently been well I wouldn't call it conversing maybe interrupting chatter with him on MSN about his latest script as he wanted me to give him some feedback on it, an E-Mail ten minutes later with his script attached and off I went trying to comprehend his latest incarnation.

It started off with an explosion at an Oil Mining facility at Antarctica which leads to all these penguins getting infected with Satan's oil as he calls it and in turn they become Killer Penguins! He wants to make it in 3D even though he hates all the recent 3D horror movies but as I said he's a bit out there. Anyway I had received the E-Mail and literally fifteen minutes later he sent me another E-Mail to ask what I thought, back on to MSN I go and this is the conversation.

ME: I've just started I'm going to need like a couple of hours to really get through it.

B.A: Sure, sure so what do you think of the opening sequence? Pretty sweet right? Didn't see that coming right?

ME: To be honest with a title like Killer Penguins From Hell, I kinda didn't know what you would do for the opening but fire and ice where two images I had in my head.

B.A: Yeah big bang, fire burns the screen and the opening credits come up 'KILLER PENGUINS FROM HELL 3D', catchy isn't it?

ME: Real catchy but maybe you could just call it Killer Penguins 3D.

B.A: Oh oh thats good like it like it, what else? Hit me, give me some of your thoughts.

ME: I was wondering how much you were attached to your lead character's name?

B.A: What do you mean AC?

ME: Well it's a bit low brow even for horror, don't you think?

B.A: What Part?

ME: The whole thing she's called T**Y Gumble, don't get me wrong there B.A it's funny in a childish way but when you are trying to create suspense it's best not to have a character, your main character having a daft name.

B.A: I see what you mean, I see yeah yeah It's a good point there AC before we go on when you get to the part where we meet her sister just mentally change her name to Joan or Beth or something, OK?

ME: What's she called now?

B.A:I'd rather not say but trust me it's funny but I see your point man yeah it doesn't help the suspense and all that.

(I skim ahead and find the name, think of something completely dirty to go before Gumble and trust me it's what your thinking)

ME: So I'll get back to you on the script?

B.A: yeah no sweat no sweat, what you working on? You still writing that show about the news guys? That s*** was funny man.

ME: I wrote about ten of them then someone wrote a fan fiction episode and it weirded me out a little, who writes fan fiction for a show that hasn't been made yet?

B.A: Yeah I read that one it was funny but didn't have the same bite as the others.

ME: I actually thought when I read it, it was paced better than my episodes she really worked the whole add breaks in well and kept up the previous episodes' story arc quite well.

B.A: Yeah but she didn't keep the sick humour there, it was all about the other guys rather than the sick guys with low morals, I loved those guys man.

ME: I do too to be honest I think I wrote the characters better in those 40 page scripts than in my movie scripts which is actually depressing.

B.A: That show has to be made my friend time for you to come to LA, we got great docs over here.

ME: To expensive, and I'm not physically able but one day I'll be there.

B.A: And I'll be your tour guide.

ME: God help me.

B.A: dude that was cold cold dude come on, cold.

ME: Icy cold, what you been up to other than writing Killer Penguins?

B.A: Don't that just sing to you? Killer Penguins 3D!!!!! I was at a test screening for *********(edited to save him from legal action) it blows and with all the budget they had I didn't see it on screen.

ME: Really, what did you put on your form?

B.A: Told them it was great of coarse, duh.

ME: Why?

B.A: Cause I God damns can't stand ******** (again edited for his sake)

ME: Hehehe.

B. A is a cool guy even if he has named himself after an eighties TV character, I finished reading the script and it ends rather strangely but actually with some politic overtures which if this was ever made would catch a lot of people of guard. He does this a lot he likes to writes a B genre script and then throws in political or social commentary at the end as his wee message to the World which I actually think is pretty cool. If it was me I would tend to write the whole script around that topic rather than just putting it into the mouth of a character that has been chased by deranged penguins for ninety minutes but I think his way is actually a good idea.

Anyhoo that's enough of that, just thought it would be fun to share one of our weird conversations with you guys.

Thanking You

The Housebound Writer