Monday, 2 August 2010

2 times a Baby

9:54-9:55am(24 rip off alert, lol)

Today's post will be written at two different times today to cover my two hospital visits, yep that's right two hospital visits in one day. The first was a morning appointment for 9am a time I haven't seen on the clock from anything other than a horizontal position in a long time. It was an appointment with the cardiology department to have a mobile ECG fitted for 24 hours so the usual mad panic to get to the hospital on time ensued and as always I was left waiting past my appointment time to be taken, ever noticed if you turn up slightly past your time they don't like it, they make a big song and dance about it and make you feel 2 foot tall but they expect you to be courteous to them when they run late? Double standards or what?

Anyhoo I digress once taken into a tiny side room to get the electrodes attached via a lot, LOT of tape and a quick check to see the machine is working right and off on my way I was, you wonder with turn around like this how they can ever run late. The one piece of advice they gave me 'Go about your normal daily routine', sure as my daily routine always consists of trying not to accidentally rip electrodes of my chest along with hair and a nipple. At least I can see the funny side in it but I just know my weekly trip to the Physchologist later on today at 3pm is not going to be comfortable sitting in that narrow low backed chair I'm going to find it incredibly hard to stay focused on the subject at hand with this gizmo sticking to me.
16:42-16:43pm (still going with the 24 rip off)
Just back from the psychologist office with more homework, I swear it's like being back in high school except maybe it's more believable if you say your dog ate it or you ate it now, lol. This week's assignment is to fill in a form about "Situations which make me feel anxious", is it only me that thinks it would be funny to write filling in this damn form made me feel anxious? LOL just me then, here is a rundown of the various parts of the form.
box1 Situation
Where was I?
What was I doing?
Who was I with?
When was it?
box 2 Anxiety/ subjective Units Of Distress Scale (SUDS) 0-100
basically you fill in on a scale of 0-100 how stressed the previous made you.
box 3 Thoughts (or images)
What was going through my mind?
What am I afraid of?
What does this mean about me?
What does this mean about what the other person thinks about me?
What is the worst thing that could happen if this is true?
Page 2 Putting my anxious thoughts on trial in court
Box 1 Thoughts (or images)
What was going through my mind?
What am I afraid might happen?
Basically a condensed version of page 1
box 2 Evidence for thought
what evidence do I have if any that supports this thought.
box 3 Evidence against this thought
What evidence do I have to prove this thought wrong.
box 4 Summary & Conclusion
What conclusions can I make given all the evidence in box 2 and 3.
This is actually a really great way to work out a lot of issues as much as I loathe filling in forms due to my incredibly poor penmanship (I should have been a doctor) this is a task I look forward to undertaking to discover if I can actually realise when a thought is fuelled by anxiety or not when I'm right there in the moment and if it effects the number of seizures I endure.
Anyhoo I've rattled on enough.
Thanking You
The Housebound Writer

22 comments:

  1. Shit man.... this is a pretty general statement, but I hope things start getting brighter for you. It sounds as if you have been experiencing a shit-storm....more like a shit-tornado.

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  2. Rico, yeah I've been waist deep in it recently but I'm trying to look at it in a positive way, sure my health gone to s**t but I got a hot girlfriend so no complaints, lol.

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  3. Emma Murty02 August, 2010

    I could hear the clock clicking down like at the as breaks in 24, lol. You got it rougher than most will ever know babes how do you stay so freaking upbeat my good friend? What's your secret?

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  4. Having a hot girlfriend helps but that's a story for another day, lol.

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  5. Emma Murty02 August, 2010

    Oh do share who is this lucky lady, lol.

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  6. Now that would be telling, lol.

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  7. I always turn up on time for doctors/dentist/whatever appointments but they always take their time and then I end up waiting half an hour or more for them. Why is this?
    Anyway, in regards to your hot girlfriend: you did mention that you're a sucker for a pretty face. But by the sounds of it she probably has a great personality too.

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  8. Hi Aspot it’s great to hear from you, yes if left alone in a room with a tea cosy she'd wear it as a hat she has a great personality but shoooosh don’t tell her I said that, lol. The girl in question is Ms Murty above we just like to kid around that we aren’t dating on the comments page of the blog. I don‘t know why as we flirt like crazy on the shoutbox on the homepage but it works somehow, lol.

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  9. Emma Murty03 August, 2010

    Yeah I would wear it as a hat, lol but Drew would wear it in a crowded room that's what makes him "Special", lol.

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  10. Love the line about you pulling off your hair and nipple. But then, I'm a sadistic fuck. lol.

    So why are you having an EKG done? And yeah, I agree about the ol' double standards when you're in the doctor's office or hospital. It's okay to make you wait for god knows how long, but not them. One time they did that shit with me, had me waiting for an hour and a half and I walked out, telling the nurse/receptionist that my time is valuable, too.

    Your psychology homework sounds pretty fucked up. I don't think I could handle all of those insane questions. lol.

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  11. Hey Kelly, the ECG was to check to see if I had an irregular heartbeat or some s*** I wasn't really listening when they explained it to me, lol. I thought you'd like the nipple thing, lol, you got to find the funny in every situation I feel or you would just go on a killing spree.

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  12. Emma Murty04 August, 2010

    Drew you love me, nah nah nahnah, lol just admit it babes it's like the worst kept secret ever.

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  13. Well duh Ems everybody knows that, what do you want me to blog about it or something?

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  14. Emma Murty04 August, 2010

    I double dare you to write something on your blog.

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  15. If somebody else leaves a comment asking for it I'll write you a love poem on my blog Ems you got a deal.

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  16. Hey DB - Can you write a love poem for Emma? She's my totally EPIC wonderful wee sister... Please please please????

    A really romantic sappy sweet one?

    Thanks! You totally EPIC big sister... :-)

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  17. Emma Murty04 August, 2010

    Thanks big sis, get to work DB, lol.

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  18. Oh crap, I didn't think anyone would actually ask for it, lol, thanks a lot Antonia.

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  19. I don't like going to hospitals at all. I'm already freaking out just looking at the questionnaire they gave you.LOL I'd rather jump off a building than deal with that... haha

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  20. Hey Eve, I hate hospitals too and ironically that questionnaire is actually given to suicidal people so you can imagine how many would jump off the nearest building after getting it, lol.

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  21. Stick with the anxiety stuff Andrew... we need to get the recognition before we can make the changes :) It's that whole thing about really learning to listen to your body and being able to differentiate between real anxiety and emotional reactions... you, my dear tartan friend, are on the road to recovery!
    Smiles and blessings.

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  22. Thanks for the kind words of support Juliana, it's always great to hear from you.

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